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Wednesdays are typically set aside for quotes that inspire me or that are pertinent in what is happening in my life at that moment. Given my complete lack of writing these days, the only thing that continued to go through my head this morning was that I needed a go-to quote about balance in life. The truth is, I just didn’t find anything that spoke to me, nothing that really fit where my head space is today, other than feeling the need for just one extra day each week. A day where I could actually not think about work for a change. A day where I could write, catch up on sleep, go to yoga, catch up on laundry or clean out my closet. Just one extra day to help me find some balance that I just can’t seem to grab hold of lately.

I feel guilty for even whining about this. Coming from a woman who doesn’t even have kids and all the work that goes along with that madness, it somehow doesn’t feel right to even fuss about losing balance in my world. Yet, here I am. I am consumed by my work most days, because I have a job that doesn’t exactly let me shut things off when I come home. The intensity of my work is only growing, as my already heavy workload is only increasing with no real relief in sight and that adds a very heavy weight to my already heavy shoulders. You see, I am a bit of a perfectionist (which doesn’t help), and as my workload increases, the pressure of missing important details is ever looming and compounding the stress. Even with a pending vacation, I know that it will still be impossible to shut down and truly recharge, I’ll have no choice but to send time working because that is the nature of my business and the expectation, which is just quite sad.

…in all things there must be balance.

Don’t get me wrong, I like what I do and love who I work for, and I am certainly all about strong work ethic and dedication, but in all things there must be balance. Unfortunately, finding balance in such an environment is challenging, if not impossible. These days, I’m just trying to get through and make time for the things I love, but I haven’t been very successful with my attempts. Sure, my weekends are usually quite fun – time spent with my husband and friends is always great, but I also find that I might be hitting the sauce too much as a way to relax and let go of the stresses. Before you know it, Saturday is just a blur, and Sunday I wake up immediately feeling the anxiety of the work week looming ahead of me.

I’m taking a step back to really look at myself and try to figure out where I can make changes that will really make a difference. Changes that will give me the opportunities to write, take care of my home, enjoy my husband and my animals, and not feel all-consumed with work. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, it’s clear to me that I need to exercise caution with the drinking, that doesn’t seem to be helping my situation any, but it isn’t going to be the only change that needs to take place. I suppose that is a good place to start, but there is still a good deal of soul-searching in the days ahead.

I will say that beyond my husband and home life, writing and this blog are extremely important to me. Writing builds me up and energizes me, I must not lose sight of that and let the days drift by without giving this attention. I need to find a way. With that, I’ll leave you with a small quote after all…

Writing is not a matter of time, but a matter or of space. If you don’t keep space in your head for writing, you won’t write even if you have the time.

– Katerina Stoykova Klemer

Pay it Forward Friday

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Not only did I miss a Pay it Forward Friday post last week, but I’ve missed most of my other posts, too. I’ve been pretty distracted with trying to establish a new routine over the past two weeks, as we have a new arrival in our home. No, it is most certainly not a baby, this 40+ woman decided long ago that wasn’t going to happen on my watch. This is a baby of other sorts – meet Gertie, our new rescue mutt:

gertie

She’s an absolute love and a  joy to have in our home, although we are all still working on settling in, including the cat. The truth is that a sense of normalcy may not return for a few weeks as this girl had to undergo heartworm treatment, and she’s under restrictions to stay very calm for a least a month. I’m looking forward to the day that when we can let her run in the yard, take her for walks, and let her burn off energy at doggy daycare.

I’m hoping to get back on track and have a solid go at writing again soon, I had only barely scratched the surface as it was. While I know this isn’t my typical Pay it Forward Friday post, I still encourage you to take this Friday and think about doing something nice for someone else in this world. There has been so much unrest recently, some of which hit a little too close to home for me in Charlotte this week, and I look forward to turning that around in some small way in my community today. I hope that you can do the same.

Wednesday Quotable

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The sense of paralysis proceeds not so much out of the mammoth size of the problem but out of the puniness of the purpose.

-Norman Cousins

Remembering

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My Sunday reflections typically involve coffee, a record, and a look back on my week. Today is different. Today marks the 15th anniversary of 9/11, a day which changed the world as we knew it forever. Anyone you talk to can tell you where they were that day when the shocking news hit, how they spent the hours watching the coverage, who they were with and how they were impacted by the tragic events. In honor of this day, and those who lost their lives, I will refrain from my usual post, but instead will share a handful of links to stories of others who survived or were closely impacted by the attack.

It is so important that we do not forget this day and, as horrifying as it was, how these events brought so many of us together.

Esquire – Michael Wright’s Escape from the 81st Floor of the World Trade Center

NJ.com – An Arizona 9/11 Survivor Story

The story of Gary Welz

Yahoo News – Final Survivor of the South Tower, Ron DiFrancesco

Slate – The Marine Who Found Two WTC Survivors

Survivor Stories – Shannon Loy

The Blaze – Courageous Firefighter Survives Collapse

Pay it Forward Friday

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homeless-1261555_640While watching the Carolina Panthers game last night, I was reminded of this ESPN article about our beloved Cam Newton (I know, some of you aren’t fans, but haters gonna hate) leaving a restaurant with his teammates towing a full meal in hand and delivering it to a homeless man on the streets of Baltimore a few weeks ago. My husband and I both take opportunities to help the homeless, whether it be buying someone on the street a meal, or giving them a few dollars, or through donating needed items to a local shelter.

I realize that maybe not everyone you see standing on the street corner holding a sign is legitimately in need, and if I hand a person $5 and he/she chooses to use that for something other than a meal, then so be it, but it’s the chance I’m willing to take. Not so long ago, I gave a man holding a sign proclaiming that he was hungry a few dollars and, after spending about 10 minutes at a location in the general vicinity, I spotted him walking out of a Chick-Fil-A with a sack of food. I’ll never forget that moment. In fact, there are a number of moments where I’ve reached out to help the homeless that will always stick with me, all for very positive reasons.


We are all just people making our way together on this same planet, after all.

 

Sure, the homeless are easy to ignore, it’s common for people to turn the other way and avoid them, but have you ever stopped to think that this could be you standing on that street corner holding a sign? We don’t know their stories, but I’m sure you’ve heard of folks who’ve seemingly had it all and then lost it for various reasons – whether controllable or not. While the possibility may be unlikely, in my opinion, any one of us could find ourselves in a situation that leads to being on the streets at some point in our lives. I always keep this in mind, and if I don’t have anything to offer someone I pass on the street or while I’m sitting in my car, I at least offer up a smile and a head nod – something to at least acknowledge their presence. We are all just people making our way together on this same planet, after all.

For this Pay it Forward Friday, I encourage you to reach out to the homeless in some way today, even if it is through a local shelter or organization. So many shelters are looking for simple items such as soap, socks, and towels, a quick stop at local store to pick up goods won’t take much out of your pocket, but it will mean so much to the folks in need.